Friday, April 8, 2011

Sugared Cinema: Anchorman (2004)

I'll give this little cookie an hour before we're doing the no-pants dance.  Time to musk up.

Wow.  Never ceases to amaze me.  What cologne you gonna go with?  London Gentleman, or wait.  No, no, no.  Hold on.  Blackbeard's Delight. 

No, she gets a special's called Sex Panther by Odeon.  It's illegal in nine countries.  Yep, it's made with bits of real panther, so you know it's good. 

Will Ferrell is a given.  That we've always known.  But Paul Rudd?  Who would have thought that he would turn out to be such a funny dude?  I didn't think he had it in him.  Certainly not after seeing him settle into the good guy role in Clueless and Romeo + Juliet.  There's only one explanation:  Sex Panther.  It's amazing what a little dab can do for your funny bone(r.)

Sex Panther Brownies

brownies, cooled and cut into squares
2 1/2-inch circle cookie cutter
green frosting
molding fondant
black food coloring
Wilton decorating tip #234 (the "grass" tip)

I should mention that I am by no means an artist or sculpter.  I studied a picture and tried to replicate it as best as I could.  If you are able to make this look more cat-like, do it up.  But here's a basic tutorial to get you started.

Start with a ball of fondant, about 2-inches in diameter.  Shape it so the bottom tapers slightly.

Pinch and raise a small portion of the fondant to form ears.

Pinch the center to form a small bridge where the nose and upper lip will be.  Do the same towards the bottom to form a bottom lip.

Use a rounded shaping tool or chopstick to push underneath the upper lip on both sides.  Use a sharp tool or knife to mark the nose and eyes.

Push the point of a shaping tool or chopstick under the eyelids to form an area for the pupils.

Use a toothpick to shape the eyes.

Roll two tiny bits of fondant into a fang shape.  Brush a little vodka on the end of the tooth and into the cavity and gently push it in until it sticks.  Repeat with the other tooth.

Now you're ready to paint the little guy.  Mix some black food coloring with about a tablespoon of vodka.  Paint the panther head, making sure to keep the teeth and eyes white.

Dip a toothpick into the vodka/coloring mixture and carefully add the pupils.

Let the sex panther dry while you work on the brownies.

Press the round cookie cutter about halfway into a brownie.  Remove the center (you may need a knife for this part.)

Pipe frosting grass all over the surface and in the center of the brownie.

For Anchorman authenticity purposes, I pushed the cookie cutter back into the hole.  But you can leave it out otherwise.

Gently place the head into the center of the brownie.

Sex Panther.

They've done studies, you know.  60% of the time it works, every time. 

Have a great weekend, friends.  Stay classy.


  1. You are too sexy for your brownies! These are fantastic! I love anchorman - met a few real life ones who are the same.

  2. "That smells like pure gasoline."

    Dude, yet again, you've amazed me. I'm sitting here with my pants (skirt) blown completely off.

    Paul Rudd is a sexy beast. Clueless and The Object of my Affection did it for me.

  3. You are absolutely mad in the best way possible.

  4. Ali, you continue to amaze me with your ability to make pop culture edible. Stay classy hon.

  5. It's so funny you decided to do Anchorman this Friday. My husband had never seen it (he hates Will Ferrell), so I begged him to watch it this week. So we watched it Wednesday night. He didn't enjoy it b/c of the "Ferrell Factor", but it was nice to watch that movie again.

    And as always - beautiful work. You better be getting paid for some of this stuff.

  6. Ali, you are my hero. You are too clever for words. And your choice of Anchorman wins. Hope you know you're about to become the next Bakerella. Glad I'll be able to say I knew you back in the good old days.

  7. Thanks guys. It's good to know there are others out there who can appreciate a thirst for randomness, movie quotes and sexy panthers.

  8. It's really hard to avoid devouring that devilish little creature in our fridge.

    Oh BTW, you are far more talented than you give yourself credit for.

  9. haha too funny! that movie is classic. your brownies look like they're straight out of the film! great job

    cute blog - i'm your newest follower.

  10. oh goodness, i love that movie and ben stiller looks so goofy as the latino anchorman!!


  11. That is amazing. Great work.

    Speaking of Paul Rudd - "I Love You, Man" is a great piece of film.

  12. dang you have outdone week you will have to construct a house! LOL

  13. i think you should def. give yourself more credit on your sculpting skills! amazing job. i survived week 1 of the shred (did last fri-today with mon off). it's quite a workout but i like it because it's short. thinking of going to level 2 on sunday. how's it going for you?

  14. Quasidan, Cailen - Hi :D Thanks for stopping by. Welcome and stuffs.

    Liam - Loved Paul Rudd's character in that movie but Jason Segel (who turned me into a fan after Forgetting Sarah Marshall) was way too unlikeable for me to stomach. I know, I know...that was sort of the point. I just couldn't get past the feeling of wanting to smack the shit out of him.

    Taylor - You are owning it, lady! Those push-ups are killer in the beginning. I do love that it's short. And the back-up girls are adorable. Unfortunately, I got distracted and fell off the wagon :( I'm starting Couch to 5K tomorrow so we'll see...

  15. I love these brownies so much-- even more than I love lamp.

  16. oh, WOW, this is my new favorite blog. I love this! great job on the panther especially... this whole thing is awesome.

    and I think James Westfall and Dr. Kenneth Noisewater would approve.

  17. I'm actually blown away. I had no idea that panther head in the first photo was a) edible, or b) created by a real live human. I thought it was a toy!!

    You're awesome, is pretty much the gist of this comment.

  18. Hi, I just saw your awesome photo on Foodgawker. This is such a brilliant idea, I love it! That was such a great movie and your brownies look tasty and perfect.

  19. This is a fantastic presentation! I hope they smelled better than pure gasoline ;).

  20. These. Are. Awesome. Haha, love it - you're quite the crafty one. My unsteady hand could not be trusted with something like this.

  21. I'm loving all of the Anchorman references in here.

    Thanks guys!

  22. These are awesome! Sugary cinema is my favorite read of the week.

  23. I've never seen it but suddenly a lot of pop culture references are making a lot of sense. Oh and did I mention you are a BAKING BEAST???? That thing is ca-raaaaazy. Crazy awesome. Can I hire you to make weird things out of baked goods?

  24. I think you are amazing, please bake a cake that look like a massive wheel of cheese....

  25. Damn.... this kicks so much ass. I watched Anchorman again this past weekend and I'm in a glass cage of emotion, I'm so moved by your talent. :)

  26. Laughing so hard--splitting my sides! Not a Ferrell fan but this is so---so... I am at a loss for words--something rare indeed!

  27. making these for my brother's birthday, I can already imagine the look on his face.

  28. I actually thought that was a statue of a animal. I didn't realize that you actually made it from food. That's amazing what you can make. You are a amazing baker.